Imagine a tightrope extending across a deep chasm between you and someone you have not yet met. Once you walk across it and begin to establish rapport with that person, you will notice that the tightrope seems to have turned into a narrow plank. Then, as you see this person a few more times and you come to look forward to it, as it becomes a joy to see them across a crowded room, you’ll notice that there is a wide, sturdy bridge leading to them – one that you can practically skip across carefree. But first, you must gingerly cross the tightrope. Here are complete step-by-step instructions for how to cross:

 

Step #1: Don’t look down

We humans tend to focus on what could go wrong, rather than what could go right. So I give you permission to ONLY focus on what could go right. Think about all the great relationships you will create and the effect that will have on your business and your personal life. Is there any more wonderful feeling than the joy we experience when sharing ourselves with someone we completely trust and enjoy being around?

Step #2: Practice on a bridge

It’s crazy but walking across an already established bridge makes the tightrope look better. In other words, practice the networking skills you learn in different books and networking quicktips on your friends until you feel comfortable with them (the skills, not your friends).

Step #3: Feel the fear and do it anyway

“I spotted her across a crowded room. Our eyes met and I knew she was the one.”

 

We’ve all heard this old movie cliché and it’s a wonderful image, but in the real world, this person has to actually go over and say something. Slinking out the back door because you aren’t sure how to start the conversation just doesn’t make for a great movie scene – or a great real life scene for that matter. Yet, at networking events I often see people struggling with immobility. While giving networking seminars for the past five years I have discovered an interesting truth. Walking into a room full of strangers is one of the top fears among networkers.

 

So remember, if you are a little scared at networking events, you are not alone. Think about that powerful statement for a moment and imagine how much someone is going to appreciate it if you can walk up and help him or her feel perfectly at ease and comfortable. You will have won a friend for life. And, if you are a little afraid, you will find your fear melts away as you become more and more skilled at helping others feel comfortable with the process of starting a conversation.

 

There you have it. A three-step process for meeting new people.

 

The first step in Brain Jogging is to write down some of the most important questions you wish you could ask your prospects in order to generate leads for your company. Here is an example of the questions a financial planner might write down:

 

• Who is the next person in your company/organization to retire? Your family and friends?
• Who was the last person in your company/organization to retire? Your family and friends?
• Who was the last person you know who changed jobs or moved to a new company?
• In your circle of family and friends who was the last person who left a company because of downsizing?
• In your circle, who has recently gotten married?
• In your circle, who recently had a child?
• Who do you know who owns their own business?
• Among those business owners you know, who is the person likely to be selling their business?
• Of the business owners you associate with, who is the most concerned about attracting and retaining employees?
• Of the business owners you know who is planning on retiring on the sale of their business?

Glossary:

Power Partner: Someone who sells to the same types of customers you sell to but does not compete with you.

Her: Refers to “his or her” but saves me from having to write it out each time.